By Eve Bell

I often write notes and letters to my future self—little reminders about where I was and where I am now. This particular note was written by frazzled, end-of-Christmas me, determined to save future me from the same fate. A letter version of A Christmas Carol.

In it, I gave myself a not to do list:

1. Don’t aim for perfect.
   Your tree doesn’t need to look like it belongs in a magazine. Your gingerbread men don’t need to resemble actual men.
2. Don’t say yes to everything.
   Carol services, festive drinks, secret Santa swaps. You don’t have to do it all. A polite “No, thank you” is a gift to yourself.
3. Don’t shop till you drop.
   If you’re overwhelmed by gifting, remember: time, attention, and shared moments often mean far more than stuff.
4. Don’t let comparison steal your joy.
   Instagram isn’t real life. No one’s showing the tantrum that followed the “perfect family photo.”
5. Don’t skip meals because you’re busy.
   Running on caffeine and mince pies might feel festive, but your mood (and stomach) will disagree.
6. Don’t forget to delegate.
   You don’t have to be the sole creator of Christmas magic. Share the workload, even if it’s not done your way.
7. Don’t keep adding to the list.
   There’s always one more thing you could do. Pause. Ask yourself if it’s really necessary. Or is it just noise.
8. Don’t feel guilty for taking time out.
   Curling up with a book, having a nap, or saying no to a party isn’t selfish. It’s essential.
9. Don’t ignore your own traditions.
   If the family loves the same cheesy Christmas movie every year, lean into it. Don’t feel like you have to reinvent the wheel.
10. Don’t forget to breathe.
    A deep breath and a moment of calm are worth more than the most perfectly wrapped present.

There’s joy in the “not doing”—and your December will thank you for it.